Dylan told me the other day that he did not want ‘an important job.’ I flashed to a sullen 20-year-old, and then a sullen 30 year-old playing Wii-9000 on my couch.
‘Oh, really?’ was my best answer. (I was also watching 54th President slide off the table).
“I don’t want a job where you have to go there every day.”
We were on our way back from KinderCamp designed to prepare him for the transition to Kindergarten and on our way to swimming. It is a tight to make everything happen on time.
We talked about what he liked (the stuffed bear area) and what he did not (having to play on a ‘little kids’ playground) and really that he didn’t like the every-day part. He didn’t want to be accountable to something and somewhere every single day/moment/second. (This is my translation of what he said).
None of us do. And I don’t know if 5 year-olds experience weekends the same way as the rest of us. Up to this point, KinderCamp is the first thing he is dong ‘every day’. Pre-school was 3 days a week, swimming 2xs, To have to get up and head out, every day to the same situation (and then on Mondays and Wednesdays rush off to swimming and on Fridays, add hip hop to that) was feeling, appropriately, like a bit much.
Somewhere in there I offered that maybe he wanted to work for himself like his Dad, so he could choose his schedule and the work he is doing.
“But does he have to go every time?”
“Well, yes, yes, it is still work. He has to do it—not every day—but most of the time.”
I am certain that Dylan will work this out. But he has been saying lately that he just does not know what job he wants to have. I tell him, as I may have to again 20 years from now, that he has time, that it is not a question to worry about but rather be interested in. He will find things that he enjoys and they will take him in a direction—but really he has time.
My other thought is that the replicating for kids the schedule the rest of us follow or see as successful is not working for him. I was talking the other day with another Dad who was saying how summers used to be just summer, unstructured time and it worked just fine. Yes, and birthday parties didn’t used to have themes. Remember when it just meant a bunch of kids came over and ran around and ate cake?
Back to the career counseling, I think Dylan would like to be independently wealthy and I will buy him a scratch ticket on the way home. I have also decided to cancel hip hop for the rest of the summer.
