Are you familiar with the parents against kids soccer game scrimmage concept? You know, where in the final practice the kids duke it out in a rousing and spastic game against their moms and/or dads?
So it is not a new idea to you? Good.
Do you have any question in your mind that if the opposing youth soccer game is a bunch of 6 + 7 year-olds that in a fight to the finish the adults would win?
Because we are grown up: Because we’ve finished growing. Because our legs (and bodies) are 2xs as long. Because we’re the grown ups we would win. Really regardless of skill. Do you get that? Do you?
So then do you think there is any reason at all, to make sure the tiny little grey sharks team of BV Elementary School knows this?
I have never seen anything like it. We get out there for the game. It is a gorgeous idyllic Northern California day, perfect for some family fun. Some of the moms and dads, myself included, have donned exercise clothes and shoes and are posturing around with stretches and mini-cheers of excitement. The kids are loving it.
Only those other moms (and some dads) weren’t posturing. They were getting ready to kick some a@*%#.
Here we go. Right out of the gate Mom #1 boots the ball down the field and the clustered gaggle of 6 + 7 year-olds follow. Oh great the goalie got it (the kick went all the way to the goalie!) and is sending it back out. Uh oh, a Dad in a plaid shirt isn’t going to let it go by that easily, he has mastery of that ball and wham, he’s got a quick pass to a Dad wearing a hat. Oh wow, we’re back to Mom #1 who has charged (hey Mom # 1 you might be off-sides) and wallops the ball BAM! thereby scoring our first goal.
We are really showing them. I am also realizing there are more adults on the field than shark players (we’ve brought in some champion middle school siblings, also playing for the adults. You are so on your own little baby sharks and we are going to eat your lunch.)
Back to the middle of the field, let’s see if these little kids can get one by us. Oh wait some of these kids can’t even tie their shoes. After the game let’s have a tying shoes contest, and maybe see who can drive home the fastest. Yeah, let’s do that too, kids against the grown ups.
Next play, Mom # 2 is getting into the scene. Oooh, some fancy footwork, (Mom #2 do you have a soccer background? This is
definitely the moment to relive that.) Oh, kid down! Fell over fancy feet mom’s moves, well kid, life is tough, you are often out numbered and out weighed by 100s of pounds, so, deal with it.
We’ve scored another goal and they have nothing! This is awesome for us. We are really winning the day right now. Yay grown ups.
It is right in here that I do mention that maybe we should take it down a notch. I go into the goalie position. There is a chance they will get one by me without my trying to let them b/c I am just not very good. They get two by me.
Somewhere after Take No Prisoners Twinkle Toes over there boots the ball over the shark goalies head for our 3rd goal I realize this is just how this is going to go. I can’t control it and the kids, my son included, are a little disheartened but trying very hard (as they have all season—did I mention we haven’t won very much—so we certainly should not let a sub-par team beat the grown ups right now, of course, I see that.)
I get giving them a good game. I really do. I get that they even want that. But….um, still a little stuck on the 6 and 7 year-oldness. Also wondering if we’d do it the same if this was a girls’ team. Just wondering what it all means.
They’ll be getting trophies and cupcakes in about 10 minutes so this will all be hopefully washed away with sugar and plastic soccer ball guys with their names on them.
In case it is not clear, we totally beat them. We are thinking about forming our own team, but having trouble lining up enough first graders to play us.
